Wednesday 29 May 2013

Worst Car Names

What’s in a name? Well, plenty, actually…  

Are you really likely to buy a car called ‘Adam’? (I don’t think so, Vauxhall.) Or get overexcited about a ‘Probe’? (Ford, you should know better.)

Car manufacturers might invest a lot of time and money into coming up with the perfect handle for their latest model, but they still sometimes get it very, very wrong.

Here are just a few of the worst car names ever... know any more?

Mitsubishi Mum 500 Shall We Join Us (1993)

With a name that’s, at best, confusing – and, at worst, slightly sexist – the Mitsubishi Mum 500 Shall We Join Us didn’t have much going for it in the looks department, either.

Kia Provo (2013)

Kia failed to pick up on the fact that the term ‘provo’ is often used as shorthand for the Provisional IRA on British and Irish shores. Luckily, this one was just a Geneva Motor Show concept car that never actually went on sale.

Renault LeCar (1976)

Renault got a little literal when they chose to market the North American version of the Renault 5 as Le Car (meaning, of course, um… ‘The Car’ in French). Predictably, the French-inspired handle failed to bring that certain je ne sais quoi to the sales figures.

Toyota Deliboy (1989)

This pretty clumsy moniker, coined by Toyota for their newest van, left us wondering if ‘deliboy’ is actually a profession…

Isuzu Mysterious Utility Wizard (1989)

Another horror from the eighties, the only things that’s really ‘mysterious’ about this SUV is why Isuzu choose such a nonsense name that’s also quite a mouthful.

Volkswagen Touareg (2002)

When Volkswagen named their new 4x4 after the Tuareg, a nomadic North African tribe, they had no way of knowing that, 10 years later, the tribe would become involved in some especially violent clashes. Despite the recent negative connotations, the car’s still in production.

Volugrafo Bimbo (1946)

The problem with this one’s pretty self-explanatory, right? Given that this open-air two-seater also looks like some sort of clown car, the odds were stacked against it from the start. You can see it in action here.

Honda Life Dunk (2001)

‘Dunk’ is a word that most of us associate with either basketball, or eating biscuits with your tea. Sadly, Honda failed to cotton on to this.

Suzuki Alto Afternoon Tea (1990)

And talking about sweet treats… Suzuki misguidedly named a 1990 model after our most British of past-times. Scones not included, unfortunately.

Honda That’s (2002)

The grammatically incorrect title (“A Honda That’s…” what?!”) didn’t stand in the way of this rather odd looking Japanese car, and Honda sold a fair few units during its four-year life span.

AMC Gremlin (1970)

It may have gone into production on April Fools’ Day, but the name of the AMC Gremlin – which literally means ‘niggling problems’ (not something you’d usually want to associate with a car) – was no joke.

Mitsubishi Minica Lettuce (1989)

Let’s face it – lettuce is pretty boring (and also sometimes limp). So why, why, why would you ever name a car after it? Big thumbs down, Mitsubishi…

So what about your car? Ever bought a used car that has a ridiculous name?

And also, my favourite name... The VW Beetle

Featured images:
  •  License: Image author owned 

I bought a Touareg from The Car People recently and started thinking about some of the ridiculous names for cars so thought I'd share...